Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It's rum buckets o'clock
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
You're breaking my sexual little heart
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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