What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
