is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
I just had sex on a roof
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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