He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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