In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Someone came in the potted fern
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Dick very happy bro
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize