Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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