it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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