He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Randomize