sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize