I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
The power of my boobs compel you
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize