I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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