I think I am morally bankrupt
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize