Betty ford says i'm here all night
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
