holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
