Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
