Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Randomize
