Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
