I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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