do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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