we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
