Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
