Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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