Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Someone came in the potted fern
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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