just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
