if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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