dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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