Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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