I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize