She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
