We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
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