I wannas sexs uuuuu
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
