But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize