It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I just had sex on a roof
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
