I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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