Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
