Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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