Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
