I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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