HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
