i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
