just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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