im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Randomize
