I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize
