He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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