you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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