You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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