I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
