fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
