Got a toothbrush?
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Houston, we have a squirter
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
wow bdsm is so cute
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