Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize