Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
